Finally, I'm back. Due to the not so subtle hints of some of my friends, I am forced to post something. Well, not exactly, as I have something to mock now. :D
I am in kolkata now, at the fag end of a month long mathematics camp. Its been overload in more than one way. The mathematics, the people and the food. Ah, I finally come to the food. I lick my lips in anticipation, not of the food, but of the chance of attacking some cuisines. If there is one word which sums up the culinarily challenged cultures of the world, both present and past, it is the following, much dreaded word - POTATO.
see this link for reference, if you do not know the meaning of this word, which is highly unlikely, unless you come from a culinarily advanced planet (by implication not the earth) - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potato
I hate people who peer at the screen while I am posting or mailing someone. OK, sorry for the interruption, I think the fellow who was committing this indiscretion has been scared away. I felt too tired to communicate verbally with him, so I had to say this.
I think you get the hang of this article. It is going to be highly non-linear with arbitrary interruptions - that's what potato has done to me. I feel a familiar stirring in my stomach when I say the word "potato" (aargh there goes...), so from now, I am going to refer to it by the euphemistic "!*!@#!@#" from now.
I find that eating the !*!@#!@# has an unsavoury effect on people, turning them one step back on the road of evolution. It can be seen in the behaviour of people in the educationally backward regions of the country like UP etc, where eating !*!@#!@# makes the people also like !*!@#!@#, big people with that familiar look in their eyes, the same look that says "so what if the world has changed and gone forward? I have my !*!@#!@#". So they stay culturally, educationally, sanitarily and culinarily retarded, giving headaches to the people who have experienced subtler tastes than that of !*!@#!@#, torturing them with !*!@#!@# morning, afternoon, night and anytime possible between. (If you do not understand why I am making a fuss about such a "trivial" matter, you can try eating the stuff sold on the railway platform in Kanpur or in any of the roadside eateries of UP. Notice: Do not say I did not warn you)
Also, notice that most of the scientfic talent of the country emerged from places like Bengal, many parts of the south, etc. The same can be said about the cultural aspect too. It seems too much of a coincidence that the set I have just described forms the compliment of the !*!@#!@# land. (Though Bengal's veg food is little better, I am weighing the culture on the majority food, and it has infinite non-veg varieties.)
As I write, most of the jests which pass off as projects seem to have finished, and the "junta" (read gen public) of IITK is "gearing up" for another year of swotting. Most of these people have nothing else to do. Their year can be concisely described as ragging the juniors, "magaai" (literal totally brainless mugging), having the "time of their lives (if you can call them that)" in the cultural fest, !*!@#!@#, and pro"jests". Give us a break, if this is the educational elite of the country, then it represents the apotheosis of the !*!@#!@# culture. As I write this, in the camp, some other IITians have just shown their pedigree. One of them attended around one-tenth of the classes (though I would say that he understood more than the others), and the others might as well have attended one-tenth. Their attention was confined to the institutuional pastime of the IITs, orkut. When they began the camp, only one of them had a profile. Having come into contact with him, the others realized that it would be a great idea to join and learn some "sophistication", having had precious little exposure in their !*!@#!@# cultures, so they joined in. Now they have more scraps than me. In fact, the state of affairs disgusted me so much that I renounced aorkut for the rest of my stay here. People who are not comfortable speaking english suddenly sprout "sophisticated" profiles, saying I'm cool, I'm hot, I'm !*!@#!@#... I hate it.
Well, I seem to have vented most of my venom, which seems to be in low supply today, so I'll leave now.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
The Electrical department (a concise way of saying "the guys who dont know why what they do works and dont care too")
This post is for all the people (in particular physics guys, in general anyone) who felt seriously underwhelmed by their respective introductory courses in Electrical Engineering. (It is also for the people who felt underwhelmed by their second, third, fourth ...... courses in Electrical Engineering.)
"An electrical engineering person is a strange person."
- myself
(Note the quote does not say an Electrical Engineer, as that would disqualify many professors, which would defeat the very purpose of this post)
It is not as if I had a pre-conceived notion that the Electrical Engineering department was taboo. I entered the course perfectly willing to learn. (mistake one) The first few days were trivial. In fact the whole course was trivial in the sense that it is actually a compendium of formulae with rules for applying them. From now, when I mean trivial, I use the word in the sense that it is comprehensible at first sight to a rational thinking person. [note the clause]
Then the non-trivial parts of the course started popping up. Some arguments in the subject bore a distinct and nasty resemblance to some in "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy".
Electrical Engineering: The output of the op-amp (operational amplifier) is A(Vid) where A is very very large. The output is finite: Therefore, the Vid (input voltage) is zero.
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The population of the universe is finite. There are an infinite number of worlds in the universe. The average number of people per world is, therefore zero. Therefore, the number of people in the universe is also zero.
Though there is a distinct difference in the two arguments, one cannot help but wonder as to how a whole "science" can be based on millions of these assuptions, some contradictory, some based on another, which is based on this one (the classic circle), and some there just for the kick.
Though I understand that the point of Electrical Engineering is not to develop a rigorous theory for this sort of thing, their way of thinking is like a dangerous first step on the rapid path to mental oblivion. When I asked the following question of one of the profs :
"When you solve a diode circuit, you assume something about the state of each diode and call the answer right if you get a circuit satisfying Kirchoff's laws etc and the diode characteristics. Why cant multiple solutions exist?"
The reply:
Blink, Blink. "This is an electrical circuit. Put an input, you will get an output. period."
Later I found that there is a fascinating branch of electrical engineering (non-linear circuit analysis) which is really concerned with the existence and uniqueness of a solution. I do not fault Electrical Engineering (pretty strange thing to say since Ive been panning it all along). It is intrinsically good. Somewhere down the line, the rot has set in. I am now seeing the pitiful echoes of a symphony, which, to me sound like the twang of a broken guitar string.
By the way, in our place, most electrical engineering students are very enthusuastic about "summer projects". If that doesn't ring a bell, read the previous post.
"An electrical engineering person is a strange person."
- myself
(Note the quote does not say an Electrical Engineer, as that would disqualify many professors, which would defeat the very purpose of this post)
It is not as if I had a pre-conceived notion that the Electrical Engineering department was taboo. I entered the course perfectly willing to learn. (mistake one) The first few days were trivial. In fact the whole course was trivial in the sense that it is actually a compendium of formulae with rules for applying them. From now, when I mean trivial, I use the word in the sense that it is comprehensible at first sight to a rational thinking person. [note the clause]
Then the non-trivial parts of the course started popping up. Some arguments in the subject bore a distinct and nasty resemblance to some in "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy".
Electrical Engineering: The output of the op-amp (operational amplifier) is A(Vid) where A is very very large. The output is finite: Therefore, the Vid (input voltage) is zero.
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The population of the universe is finite. There are an infinite number of worlds in the universe. The average number of people per world is, therefore zero. Therefore, the number of people in the universe is also zero.
Though there is a distinct difference in the two arguments, one cannot help but wonder as to how a whole "science" can be based on millions of these assuptions, some contradictory, some based on another, which is based on this one (the classic circle), and some there just for the kick.
Though I understand that the point of Electrical Engineering is not to develop a rigorous theory for this sort of thing, their way of thinking is like a dangerous first step on the rapid path to mental oblivion. When I asked the following question of one of the profs :
"When you solve a diode circuit, you assume something about the state of each diode and call the answer right if you get a circuit satisfying Kirchoff's laws etc and the diode characteristics. Why cant multiple solutions exist?"
The reply:
Blink, Blink. "This is an electrical circuit. Put an input, you will get an output. period."
Later I found that there is a fascinating branch of electrical engineering (non-linear circuit analysis) which is really concerned with the existence and uniqueness of a solution. I do not fault Electrical Engineering (pretty strange thing to say since Ive been panning it all along). It is intrinsically good. Somewhere down the line, the rot has set in. I am now seeing the pitiful echoes of a symphony, which, to me sound like the twang of a broken guitar string.
By the way, in our place, most electrical engineering students are very enthusuastic about "summer projects". If that doesn't ring a bell, read the previous post.
project (notice how the title stands by itself, starkly, without embellishment, coldly inspiring dread)
This post is about an IITK issue. (It is from my experience only. Point one, as I speak, the virus may have manifested itself in other IITs too. Point two, its not even an issue, except maybe for me and some like minded people (read none))
As the summer approaches, the atmosphere in IITK heats up (not just literally, which it anyway does). Suddenly everyone gets interested in a "summer project". People who were earlier not interested in anything academic or scholarly (note that everything academic is not scholarly and vice versa) suddenly want to do a "project". The CC comps, previously used only for orkuting (For those who dont know, it is a group where a person gets to know like minded people, who generally do nothing except look for like minded people, which implies that this person does nothing except looking for like minded people. [A classic case of infinite recursion]. It also involves a double edged weapon of torture (two in one!) (atleast for me), which is euphemistically called a scrapbook....err.. this is getting too long. Guess I have to do another post exclusively on this topic... Anyway, you must have got the message) suddenly become hotbeds of pseudo academic activity, where people start searching for "projects". The scrapbooks, which earlier formed the venues for conversations like "abe @##$%*&! ut saale (get up) nahi to fakka lagega (otherwise you will get an F)" suddenly get filled with "mai so and so club mai project kar raha hoon. Kuch project suggest karo".
When there is an F to F meeting, the conversation closely follows the template of the sample conversation given below -
A: Hai, congrats, souwa scrap ho gaya? (Hi, congrats on your 100th scrap)
B: Tere to teen sou hai na, @#$%&*! (You have 300, @#$%&*!)
A: To, kya haal hai? (So how are you?)
B: Kya bolu, endsems agaya. (What to say? Endsems are here)
A: Magaai kaisi chal rahi hai? (How is the mugging going on? (Mugging is in the literal sense))
B: @#$%&* raha hai. (Not coming on at all)
A: Pura sem mai classes nahi attend kiya to yehi hoga. (If you do not attend classes the whole sem, this is what happens)
A: Batti mai to sikka aur dikka ke borderline pe hoon. Tauwa main to @#$%&* ho gaya. (In electronics, I am between a C and a D. I am not doing well at all in TA).
B: Mere haal be kuch aisa hi hain. (Even I am in a similar situation)
A: Pehle sem mai maths me fakka padaa na @#$!%&! (You got an F in maths in the first sem, didnt you @#$!%&!) (Note that the swear-words are going to become so abundant that my usage of an arbitrary string of symbols is going to seriously degrade the quality of the sentence. So from now, when such sublime language is used, I am going to represent it conveniently with the symbol [abuse])
B: Is sem mai bhi wohi haal hai . (I am in the same situation in this semester too )
A: To summers mai yaha rukoge hi . (So you must be staying back in the summers )
B: Kya karoon, wohi karna hain (What to do , I must stay back)
A: Mai bhi shayad yaha summer mai ruk re. (I may also stay back in the summer)
B: Kya X yaha summer mai ruk re ? (Is X staying back in the summer or what, ) (Where X refers to an unnamed girl in the batch with whom A is mistakenly associated, though in all probability X has not heard of, nor will ever hear of A)
A: ai project karna chahta hoon. ( , I want to do a project) (Generally, the word 'project' is pronounced by bounty hunters as it is in TA [as a part of projection], probably because they hadn't heard of the word before their ill fated attempts to mug up procedures for the TA exam) (Also note the late stage of the conversation at which the main objective is introduced, all the while indulging in a conversation designed to maximise the pleasure each gets from the other's total ignorance, lack of culture and sophistication)
B: Kya project kar rahe ho ? (What project are you doing ?)
A: pata nahin. ( I dont know )
B: Abe , tu robo club ka secy hai na. ( , you are a secy of the robo club)
A: Arre , mujhe yaad bhi nahin aya. ( , I didn't even remember it)
B: Abe , fraud aadmi, kaisa secy ban gaya? ( , you fraud, how did you become a secy?)
A: mujhe bhi nahin pata. Interview main to hag diya. Pata nahin ki woh log mujhe kaisa select kiya. Muft mai secy ban gaya. Yahan aane se pehle maine 'robot' naam bhi nahi suna .( , even I don't know. I performed horribly in the interview. I dont know how they selected me. I became a secy for free. I had never heard the word 'robot' before coming here)
B: To robotics mai project karo na. Net pai search maaro. Shaayad orkut par kuch logon ne pehle robot dekha hoga. dhoond (So do a project in robotics, Do a search on the net. Maybe there is someone on orkut who has seen a robot before. Search )
A: Haan wo kaam kar doonga. Tu bhi ruk re na, to hum dono milke "project" karte hain. (Yes I'll do that work. Since you will also stay, we'll do the "project" together) (Note that he is so pleased by the transcendental wisdom of the other's suggestion that in his bliss, he forgets to introduce a swear word into the conversation)
B: Woh to karte hain. Lekin ab to magna hain na . Fakka to bachaana hain na .
(Lets do that work. But now I must mug . I have to prevent myself from getting an F ) (Notice the overkill of abuses in the sentence, so as to bring this (un?)savoury element back into the conversation and reduce it from its previously stratospheric heights)
Both go on their respective ways. Later they will unite and change the world with their "project"........
Antonio Saglieri in the very last scene in Amadeus:
"Mediocrity is everwhere....
I absolve you
I absolve you
I absolve you all...."
As the summer approaches, the atmosphere in IITK heats up (not just literally, which it anyway does). Suddenly everyone gets interested in a "summer project". People who were earlier not interested in anything academic or scholarly (note that everything academic is not scholarly and vice versa) suddenly want to do a "project". The CC comps, previously used only for orkuting (For those who dont know, it is a group where a person gets to know like minded people, who generally do nothing except look for like minded people, which implies that this person does nothing except looking for like minded people. [A classic case of infinite recursion]. It also involves a double edged weapon of torture (two in one!) (atleast for me), which is euphemistically called a scrapbook....err.. this is getting too long. Guess I have to do another post exclusively on this topic... Anyway, you must have got the message) suddenly become hotbeds of pseudo academic activity, where people start searching for "projects". The scrapbooks, which earlier formed the venues for conversations like "abe @##$%*&! ut saale (get up) nahi to fakka lagega (otherwise you will get an F)" suddenly get filled with "mai so and so club mai project kar raha hoon. Kuch project suggest karo".
When there is an F to F meeting, the conversation closely follows the template of the sample conversation given below -
A: Hai, congrats, souwa scrap ho gaya? (Hi, congrats on your 100th scrap)
B: Tere to teen sou hai na, @#$%&*! (You have 300, @#$%&*!)
A: To, kya haal hai? (So how are you?)
B: Kya bolu, endsems agaya. (What to say? Endsems are here)
A: Magaai kaisi chal rahi hai? (How is the mugging going on? (Mugging is in the literal sense))
B: @#$%&* raha hai. (Not coming on at all)
A: Pura sem mai classes nahi attend kiya to yehi hoga. (If you do not attend classes the whole sem, this is what happens)
A: Batti mai to sikka aur dikka ke borderline pe hoon. Tauwa main to @#$%&* ho gaya. (In electronics, I am between a C and a D. I am not doing well at all in TA).
B: Mere haal be kuch aisa hi hain. (Even I am in a similar situation)
A: Pehle sem mai maths me fakka padaa na @#$!%&! (You got an F in maths in the first sem, didnt you @#$!%&!) (Note that the swear-words are going to become so abundant that my usage of an arbitrary string of symbols is going to seriously degrade the quality of the sentence. So from now, when such sublime language is used, I am going to represent it conveniently with the symbol [abuse]
B: Is sem mai bhi wohi haal hai
A: To summers mai yaha rukoge hi
B: Kya karoon
A: Mai bhi shayad yaha summer mai ruk re. (I may also stay back in the summer)
B: Kya X yaha summer mai ruk re
A:
B: Kya project kar rahe ho
A:
B: Abe
A: Arre
B: Abe
A:
B: To robotics mai project karo na
A: Haan wo kaam kar doonga. Tu bhi ruk re na, to hum dono milke "project" karte hain. (Yes I'll do that work. Since you will also stay, we'll do the "project" together) (Note that he is so pleased by the transcendental wisdom of the other's suggestion that in his bliss, he forgets to introduce a swear word into the conversation)
B: Woh to karte hain. Lekin ab to magna hain na
(Lets do that work. But now I must mug
Both go on their respective ways. Later they will unite and change the world with their "project"........
Antonio Saglieri in the very last scene in Amadeus:
"Mediocrity is everwhere....
I absolve you
I absolve you
I absolve you all...."
Monday, May 01, 2006
post 2: (coudnt think of a better title :})
Ok
To bring everything upto date, I am Tejaswi, studying physics in IIT Kanpur. (That is a pretty concise way of summing up : to be edited later).
So, why am I blogging? As it is, I am too busy (read lazy) to keep a journal of my exploits. Still, its nice to write now and then.
Yesterday, our exams ended. We had an electronics exam. I committed the stupid error of converting a 100 ohm resistor into a 100 kiloohm one. (I know nirbheek is going to read this.....) It was an op-amp question. Remarkably, it was an interesting question, and you need a good grasp of op-amps to explain the output. I did the question nicely, but imagine when I come back and am told that was a 100 ohm resistor! (If you are already getting bored, you are either Nirbheek or this blog is not for you (do not read the 'or' as an exclusive or) (ouch! electronics creeping into my converation...)) Otherwise the exam was fine.
After the exam, we then decided on the spot to go to Kanpur for a dinner. The dinner was good. (that DOES seem a very concise way of summing an outing, but again...... ). At this stage, a relevant link would be this.
To bring everything upto date, I am Tejaswi, studying physics in IIT Kanpur. (That is a pretty concise way of summing up : to be edited later).
So, why am I blogging? As it is, I am too busy (read lazy) to keep a journal of my exploits. Still, its nice to write now and then.
Yesterday, our exams ended. We had an electronics exam. I committed the stupid error of converting a 100 ohm resistor into a 100 kiloohm one. (I know nirbheek is going to read this.....) It was an op-amp question. Remarkably, it was an interesting question, and you need a good grasp of op-amps to explain the output. I did the question nicely, but imagine when I come back and am told that was a 100 ohm resistor! (If you are already getting bored, you are either Nirbheek or this blog is not for you (do not read the 'or' as an exclusive or) (ouch! electronics creeping into my converation...)) Otherwise the exam was fine.
After the exam, we then decided on the spot to go to Kanpur for a dinner. The dinner was good. (that DOES seem a very concise way of summing an outing, but again...... ). At this stage, a relevant link would be this.
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